Posts tagged with 'couples'
Conflict: not too much, not too little - and how to make it constructive
21st May 2011
(this post is downloadable as both a Word doc and as a PDF file). I wrote yesterday about conflict and the costs of over- and under-assertiveness. Today's post adds further thoughts about making conflict constructive. Relationships are the source of much of humanity's greatest joys and greatest sorrows. They have …
Conflict: not too much, not too little - some research suggestions
20th May 2011
(this post is downloadable as both a Word doc and as a PDF file). Occasional disagreement and conflict are pretty much inevitable. I scanned Medline for relevant research articles to see if there are any helpful insights that have emerged recently. As usual when one trawls for information, hundreds of …
Valentine's day: "language style matching predicts relationship initiation and stability"
14th February 2011
Valentine's Day! Well here's a topical research study. Professor Jamie Pennebaker is probably best known for his research on expressive writing - see, for example, the series of four blog posts I wrote about his lecture at last year's British Association for Behavioural and Cognitive Psychotherapies' conference. However, as he …
Recent research: 4 studies on prayer and their implications for compassion, loving-kindness & goodwill meditation practices
24th November 2010
"If you want others to be happy, practise compassion. If you want to be happy, practise compassion" Dalai Lama I was struck by three recent research papers on intercessory prayer, and one somewhat less recent meta-analysis. What I found most interesting about these studies is their potential relevance for meditation/prayer …
30th wedding anniversary ceilidh: celebration, social networks & gratitude
31st October 2010
Yesterday, Catero and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary with a ceilidh. This is Auld Lang Syne at the end of the party. I'm the loudmouth (on one glass of wine), with dear Catero on my left (to the right in the picture). Laura, precious stepdaughter, is three places to …
Meeting at relational depth: a model
28th October 2010
I went to a workshop on Saturday about "Relational depth". As is usually the case, chewing over the material afterwards, thinking about how it's relevant for myself & my work, following up some leads - these seem crucial activities to promote "digestion" rather than a quick learning meal that goes …
Meeting at relational depth: what gets in the way?
27th October 2010
This is the fifth in a series of six blog posts triggered by going to a workshop "Meeting at relational depth" taken by Mick Cooper in Glasgow. I've already written about two exercises we explored during the morning session - "Meeting at relational depth: what does it involve?" and "Meeting …
Meeting at relational depth: links to attachment
26th October 2010
Yesterday I wrote a post "Meeting at relational depth: what intrigued me most". I described how, in this one day workshop, I paired up with someone I'd never met before and acted as client in a 20 minute role-played counselling session. Every minute we independently estimated how deeply we felt …
Strong relationships improve survival as much as quitting smoking
5th September 2010
The August 11th edition of the British Medical Journal reported: "Having strong social relationships seems to have an effect on survival comparable to that of quitting smoking and larger than controlling traditional risk factors, such as obesity or hypertension. A meta-analysis of social relationships and mortality looked at 308,849 participants …
Recent research: six studies on money, happiness, romance, leadership, self-compassion & avoidance
26th August 2010
Here are half a dozen recent research studies that caught my eye. Diener et al, in a large sample of people round the world, found intriguingly that wealth tends to increase life satisfaction, while it is the fulfilment of psychological needs - learning, autonomy, using one's skills, respect, and the …